I have been plagued with loads of bad decisions of late. Agrrrrrh!!! I have not crossed the entire task on my “To-Do” list, more like 40% completion from the day I started my leave. Gutted I’d be missing TedX Lagos! Been planning to attend for some time now, Chef Fregz, Tonye Cole, Kelechi Amadi, Eldee, Oriental Hotel, paparazzi, “ideas worth sharing, ideas worth listening to” I am so missing it.
I committed to a trip just before I realized Friday was the day, but hey I kinda enjoyed my trip, and here is a journal of my trip to my home town Ido Ekiti.
PS: Pardon all errors and unstructured or uncoordinated statements… I have been writing only structured memos all year round, here is a blog post in days and months so…
I was greeted with loads of “Do you remember me?” which I respond confidently to “of course I do” and they go like “who am I?” and I chuckle while I try to escape from the scene, in my mind I’m like “you are who you are jare no dey harass my memory”.
The sad thing is that my maternal Grand Ma didn’t recognize me :(, we have been worlds apart, I need to visit her often, she is aging gracefully. but hey! I am still cool with my agile paternal Grand Ma and any mention of Grand Ma henceforth refers to her.
Mum just dragged me to the corner
Mum: “Hope you brought something for Grand Ma?”
Tope: “Sure I did”
Mum: “Great! How much do you want to give her?”
Me: “Why all this interrogation? K”
Mum: “You see, you need to give that woman with her something as well, and your aunty and the other dark lady that welcomed us….” She was the one who cared for me when I was pregnant while your Grand Ma traveled to Ilorin
Me: Ok Mum “e ma(don’t) worry” I’d settle all of them.
Seems this will be a trend going forward, everyone has to “jeun omo” i.e. benefit from a child’s riches and I’d gladly go “broke” for those that made me who I’m today.
I always love when my Grand Ma prays! She is the definition of a praying mother that fights the battle of all her family members late at night, on the mountain (don’t know how they survive with snakes and all).
While on her knees praying for me, she will refer to the back she used to care for my dad and pray fervently for my future wife and our unborn baby, holding her breasts with both hands she will pray that the same favors my dad encountered simply because he fed on her breast will flow to me.
Using me as a point of contact, she prayed for my brothers and sister, I kinda like this part because I believe my magnetic head will take all the prayers, literally, the prayer can’t touch PH, Manchester, and Lagos in minutes :d (location of all my siblings then).
The Village Home:
Seriously, I don’t know how the Igbos do dis S**t, building Mansions that no one will occupy until year-end Xmas fiestas or probably when a close family member dies or sorry there is a wedding.
Here we are in our “country home” – a modest bungalow, armed with a cutlass, sharp eyes, sensitive ears, and a touch light, lifting all the curtains, checking all wardrobes, all nooks, and crannies, all cold spots, a reptile might just be chilling in the corner defending its territory (too much Nat Geo Wild lol). Conclusion I’d rather stay in a hotel next time.
It is like a reunion in this country home! I didn’t know this was where mum deported all our childhood home appliances et al, the old ENO 3 cylinder gas that burns just like a stove if you want to compare it (in techy parlance) to the current crop of gas cookers out there. ENO will be Edge while the recent ones will be 4G LTE.
The National brand of Blender still looks rusty but in good working condition, still speeding a 400 HPs lol and finally my beloved Eleganza flask, this “dude” held the hot water we used all through our childhood for the famous Nasco Corn Flakes, Ovaltine Malted Milk powder, Three Crowns evaporated milk, etc adulthood is a scam, don’t grow up!
It is 8am on Day 2 and Grand Ma was already at the gate with her lace and gele in a sack. I had promised her an hour Photo Session yesterday.
It was not entirely my idea, I only take random pictures of her whenever we get to chill together. This time Dad asked for a series of shots.
Jokes about death:
Acting as a director of a Tade Ogidan movie, Dad was on hand to direct the proceedings at the photo session. “Tell mama to wave her hand,” he said in English, “we’d use it as a cover shot at her burial”. Mum jumped into our tactical convo, laughing vigorously and without hesitation translated our coded yarns to Yoruba.
To my surprise, mama laughed about it and said she was ready anytime (seems death is now a joke) and was glad to wave her hand like a flag being controlled by the wind while she blurted out “bayi bayi o”
After some minutes of lights, camera, action mama was on her way to a church meeting where widows gather, I was quick to remind her I’m her husband ;).
The Big Question:
If you are from an Ekiti family and of marriageable age, you most likely would have heard some rules around tribes, states, and regions where you must and should not marry into. Famous of all is the anti-Ijebu campaign, so I threw the question to Grand Ma in the company of her younger sister and my aunt.
Grand Ma simply said “send me the names of the potential “wifeys” and I’d pray for God to guide you”. However, the general consensus is that an Ekiti man should marry an Ekiti chic (who wouldn’t support his clan’s men?) but there are loads of allegations against different tribes which I do not agree with Ijebu’s do a lot of juju (who doesn’t?), Igbo culture is too strong and stringent (a man must surely believe in something else, he’d fall for anything), “Ulesha nan o’dara” we don’t gel (can you leave your ancestors out of this?).
Conclusion: My son must sha marry an extremely cute Igbo chic preferably from Anambra. As for myself, I have resolved to at least marry from their chosen tribe.
The Royal family:
Ok, there is a very cute lady in my town and she is the Queen!!! I think only the Tejuosho’s are finer (don’t tell her!) Lol. Had the privilege of meeting her up close on her birthday and it was a lovely one.
The “church session” had loads of classical music on repeat (as befitting of the royal family), was on the same table as some local government political guys and this discussion ensued after they escorted the Chief Medical Director of Federal Medical Centre Ido Ekiti to his car on his exit.
Political Guy: Bros, please who covered our food for us?
Me: A lady in black, when I see her I’d show you!
Political Guy: Is it the lady in the brown Ofi (Aso Oke) blouse?
ME: (in my mind: Ni**a I just said black are you deaf?) No, the lady had a black blouse on
ME: Ok here she is (pointing at the woman)
Political Guy: O great, I can now eat the food again
ME: (So u dey fear to die abi… say she don put jazz for the food)… my thoughts
Only God knows when next I’d visit Ido Ekiti, till then, Ciao
Feel free to drop your comments and tell me about your visit to your villa. cheers
Comments on “The Village Journal – Ido Ekiti, Ekiti State”
I loved it…:D
Thank you 🙂
Anambra chic right? *winks* My dota will make it! Halleluia!!! Nice one! But u didn't show us where u were pounding yam 🙁
Nice one. Plenty of rust flying around sha. But understandable since u confessed u haven't blogged in a while.
Well, the issue of marrying from ur tribe is the same across tribes in our parents' generation. I had to sit with my mum and get a concession on it wen the igala chic she was rooting for scammed me. Lol.
And dude! U want to go to Anambra? You no wan marry till u be SM abi (8millon naira bride price thingz). They are even more against marrying outsiders than Ekiti people.
Now that you've read my comment, oya go and read my blog. I hope u enjoy the banks,cops and robbers story. Been too lazy to write lately but Part 3 will be out soon by God's grace.
Hope you dropped the names for Grandma sha?*wink*
Snakes everywhere for real :O that's why we had to excise Ekiti from Ondo 😛
As for marriage you can marry Ondo you're sure your descendants will be bright 😉
lol that is cos i didn't pound… and yes my son will marry ur daughter :d
hahaha eff u… gimme ur sister nah. i'd be a good in-law… fanx for stopping by
didn't have any name to drop… can i drop your nickname? lol
Looooooool, Anambra huh? I sense something. Lovely writeup, I ve always wanted to visit places like that. Some misspelling but gud. I hope u actually dropped d names.
Hmmmm…I read it first o..buh! Last 2 drop comment cos I ve been reading over n over again..amazing talent u ve got…village life different from obodo Oyinbo…Granma is so cute wt great body (Long live granma effu)..lol!! don't worry u can marry Fulani..bring down here (boko haram no dey reach south)..just make sure she is slim, so she can be like granma wen she old… U shld ve traveled wit "o pa ayan o n pa efon" from lagos traffic sales..lol..Nice one.
lol jero… wetin u sense? go to ur own village don't come to mine :p
hehehehe i shld translate the skills to memos abi? yimu